Don’t worry: the fault-finding proceeds as usual in the “In a Word†section below. But first, a small and subjective sampling of sparkling prose from recent editions. Nominations are always welcome.
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Metro, 3/12:
As Rats Persist, Transit Agency Hopes to Curb Their Births
They have thwarted the poisons. They have evaded the traps. And on Monday, the rats of the New York City subway system received another shot across the bow from the Metropolitan Transportation Authority. …
One challenge, the authority said, was offering the rats a bait that they might prefer to the subway system’s daily treasures â€" half-eaten gyros and chicken fried rice, stale pizza and discarded churros.
Pure garbage poetry, from Matt Flegenheimer’s report on the M.T.A.’s latest rodent strategy.
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Science, 3/15:
Some Primitive Birds Flew With 4 Wings, Study Says
At the time, these “basal bird†species appeared to be replacing their hind-limb feathers with scales and developing more birdlike feet. The researchers suggested that the four-winged creatures were already getting ready to use their hind limbs for terrestrial locomotion, like the robin pursuing worms on a lawn or the disputatious crow strutting around an overturned trash can.
And another trash-inspired verbal gem, a vivid image from John Noble Wilford’s account of early birds and their limbs.
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Foreign, 3/12:
In China, Cinematic Flops Suggest Fading of an Icon
National celebrations of “Learn From Lei Feng Day,†which was observed last Tuesday, turned into something of a public relations debacle after the party icon’s celluloid resurrection in not one but three films about his life was thwarted by a distinctly capitalist weapon: the box office bomb.
Plays on words can be perilous unless they are truly clever. This one â€" from Dan Levin’s story about the fading popularity of a Communist hero â€" fit the bill.
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Metro, 2/12:
Why Buy a Condo You Seldom Use Because You Can
Some residents, like Mr. Attias and Ms. Cutler of the Plaza, say the sparse population means extra privacy, lots of attention from the staff and very little noise. Mr. Stewart said he always pointed it out at Time Warner as a selling point.
Others, however, describe living in a deserted piggy bank as something else: lonely.
Liz Harris came up with this arresting description for high-priced condo buildings left empty by owners who use their units only for rare New York visits.
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Obituaries, 2/23:
Alan F. Westin, Who Transformed Privacy Debate Before the Web Era, Dies at 83
The son of Irving Westin and the former Etta Furman, Alan Furman Westin was born in Manhattan on Oct. 11, 1929; received a bachelor’s degree in political science from the University of Florida in 1948, followed by a law degree from Harvard in 1951; was admitted to the bar in 1952; married Bea Shapoff, a teacher, in 1954 in a ceremony in which the bride wore a waltz-length white gown; joined the Columbia faculty in 1959; earned a Ph.D. in political science from Harvard in 1965 (his dissertation topic was “Privacy in Western Political Historyâ€); lived for many years in Teaneck, N.J.; edited a string of books, including “Freedom Now! The Civil-Rights Struggle in America†(1964), “Information Technology in a Democracy†(1971) and “Getting Angry Six Times a Week: A Portfolio of Political Cartoons†(1979); once made a sound recording titled “I Wonder Who’s Bugging You Nowâ€; was a member of the American Civil Liberties Union, the Anti-Defamation League of B’nai B’rith and the AmericanJewish Congress; had a Social Security number obtained in Massachusetts; and was a registered Democrat who last voted in 2011 â€" all public information, obtainable online at the touch of a button or two.
Margo Fox’s final paragraph gave plenty of information and a vivid illustration of the theme of this obit â€" the issue of privacy in the computer age. The obit also included this memorable sentence: Since the first hominid grunted gossip about the hominid next door, every new communications medium has entailed new impingements on privacy.
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Metro, 12/28:
Rare Choreography of Cooperation for Riders Caught Between an F and an M
They toil in a city of haggard indifference and missed connections, where the simplest task can devolve into a competitive sport.
But consider the altruists of the Sixth Avenue line on the Lower East Side, keepers of perhaps the most collaborative corner of the subway system.
Another memorable note from underground by Matt Flegenheimer, this time about the subway station where commuters actually share information with fellow riders.
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National, 12/27:
Summoned Back to Work, Senators Chafe at Inaction
“Members of the House of Representatives are out watching movies and watching their kids play soccer and basketball and doing all kinds of things,†said Mr. Reid, in a ferocious floor attack on the House that he returned to periodically throughout the day Thursday, like an angry father-in-law revisiting a grudge he’s been nursing all year. “They should be here.â€
A very recognizable image enlivened this Congressional scene story by Jennifer Steinhauer.
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In a Word
This week’s grab bag of grammar, style and other missteps, compiled with help from colleagues and readers.
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The theft, including works by Vermeer, Rembrandt, Manet and Degas, were valued at $500 million. It remains the largest property crime in American history.
Agreement problem; make it “The theft … was valued at.â€
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In his ruling, Justice Tingling concurred with much of the beverage industry’s legal arguments.
“Many,†not “much,†with the plural “arguments.â€
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Lacking substance, the optics of the president’s visit will loom all the larger.
Dangler; it was the visit, not the “optics,†that was lacking substance. Rephrase.
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Ground is scheduled to be broken this year on an $800 million, 39-story hotel and retail complex at 701 Seventh Avenue, at the northern edge of Times Square, and plans for a $140 million renovation of the retail beneath the New York Marriott Marquis Times Square are also under way.
Avoid this jargony use of “retailâ€; make it “retail space†or just “stores.â€
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But the question of his past has never been far below the surface, rekindling accusations relating to a conflict in which as many as 30,000 people were disappeared, tortured or killed by the dictatorship.
This transitive or passive use of “disappear†became prominent at the time, but is likely to be jarring and unfamiliar to many readers now. If we use it, put it in quotes or otherwise explain it.
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The son of a conservative-leaning Episcopalian father from Texas and a more liberal Jewish mother from New York, Mr. Rhodes grew up in a home where even sports loyalties were divided: he and his mother are ardent Mets fans; his father and his older brother, David, root for the Yankees.
“Episcopal†is the modifier.
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But the fact that he did not spend anything else on the familiar trappings of a campaign, like a campaign staff, suggest that he is either waiting until the last minute to decide or dropping the idea.
Another agreement problem; once again, we were thrown off by the intervening words. Make it “the fact … suggests.â€
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His opponents said his emphasis on growth, along with the salaries and perks for a few top employees, were more appropriate to a corporation than a nonprofit institution.
The subject of the sentence is the singular “emphasis.†The prepositional phrase “along with the salaries and perks†does not create a compound, plural subject. Make it “said his emphasis on growth … was more appropriate,†or use “and†in place of “along with.â€
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Their combined showings illustrate the emergence of a younger generation on the right, both among elected officials and the base.
Words like “both†and “neither†must be followed by parallel pairs. Make it “among both elected officials and the base,†or “both among elected officials and with the base.â€
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The bills have become more prolific in part, he and others say, because conservatives control both the governorships and legislatures in 24 states.
“Prolific†means producing something in abundance. The bills are not prolific, though their authors may be.
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But for fans of sinkholes, of which there are more than one might think, this is a very good time, indeed.
The context suggests that the relative clause was meant to describe “fans,†in which case we needed “whom.â€
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BOSTON â€" The Boston School Committee, once synonymous with fierce resistance to racial integration, took a historic step Wednesday night and threw off the last remnants of forced busing first imposed in 1974 under a federal court desegregation order.
From The Times’s stylebook:
The expression forced busing is polemical; use court-ordered busing.
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It appears to be one of those apps that overshares, but it isn’t.
Recorded announcement from the stylebook:
[N]ote the plural verb in a construction like She is one of the people who love the Yankees. The test is to reverse the sentence: Of the people who love the Yankees, she is one.
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Radiation treatment for breast cancer would increase that risk to between 2.4 percent to 3.4 percent, depending on how much radiation hits the heart.
Make it “between 2.4 percent and 3.4 percent†(it was later fixed).
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They found that collapsing bird populations were more strongly correlated with insecticide use than with habitat alteration â€" that, in fact, pesticides were four times more likely to be linked with bird losses than any other cause.
From the stylebook:
times less, times more. Writers who speak of three times more or three times faster often mean “multiplied by 3,†but precise readers are likely to understand the meaning as “multiplied by 4″: the original quantity or speed, plus three more times. For clarity, avoid times more, times faster, times bigger, etc. Write four times as much (or as fast, etc.). And do not write times less or times smaller (or things like times as thin or times as short). A quantity can decrease only one time before disappearing, and then there is nothing left to decrease further. Make it one-third as much (or as tall, or as fast).
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Democrats said the Republican budget was further proof that Republicans were out-of-touch with ordinary Americans, who already delivered their verdict on the Ryan plan.
No hyphens needed.
